Untitled

 What is left when cancer takes a child? How can it be okay when your niece knows she is now dying… when the words include end of life care but that means days of her knowing and the destruction of her mother. 

There are no words or comfort or reprieve. 

How is it okay to wish for a quick passing when my sister is  begging and is buying more time. 

I fear for her, us, me 

How do I stop crying so randomly and in such deep ways. How can I hide something so deeply painful in hopes of not having to talk about it because it is insane and horrifically sad.

2 days until Christmas 

I am worried my sister may not be able to exist past this